Chapter 19
“It’s difficult. This is private property, after all.”
“Bullshit, difficult.”
I smell it, I smell it.
Ever since I was young, I’ve been very perceptive. Analyzing people’s outward behavior, tone, and tendencies to deduce their hidden intentions was a kind of hobby for me.
If you ask why I developed such a creepy and messed up hobby, it’s simply because everyone around me was a bunch of hypocrites.
My relatives, who took me in as an orphan, enjoyed the government subsidies and the boost to their reputation, or my classmates, who felt superior knowing they were better off than a parentless orphan, no matter how pathetic they were.
Surrounded by such scumbags, all I could do was resist fiercely or subtly uncover their true intentions.
Choosing the former brought a brief thrill and a heavy responsibility, while the latter offered pleasure without consequences.
There were those who tried to hide something, those who lied to deceive others while knowing everything, and those who acted friendly and kind on the surface but did whatever they wanted behind their backs.
The man standing in the middle of the hallway, barely 10 meters away, was the type I was most familiar with.
“A sensible person in society would introduce themselves first. My business card doesn’t say ‘your mom’ on it, so don’t be too intimidated.”
I flicked a business card with the nonsensical title”Supernatural Phenomenon Solver”printed on it.
It wasn’t entirely wrong, considering that before the Lord Jesus, it’s only natural for evil energy, dirty magic, and absurd contracts to be shattered.
In the end, it’s a first-come-first-served game where the one who repents and prays quickly wins. So what’s the big deal about supernatural phenomena?
“Assistant Manager Han, Assistant Manager Han, Assistant Manager Han.”
“Assistant Manager is the only position that’s more hardworking than a lazy supervisor and more competent than a good-for-nothing stuck as a permanent section chief, right?”
The man snatched my business card from the air. He stared at it without any change in expression before crushing it into a fistful of dust.
“I’ve memorized it.”
“Now it’s your turn to give me your name. You gotta give something to get something.”
I gestured for a business card, but the man just smiled.
“Your approach is quite refreshing, unlike theirs. Usually, those filthy bastards’ lackeys are so simple-minded that they tie me up and threaten me to spill my name.”
“It’s the 21st century. Only intelligent people can survive. They say that without a smartphone, humans are reduced to primates in suits, right?”
That’s why I always hated suits.
Because I’ve seen the reality where some people in suits scream like chimpanzees, while others laze around like pigs or eat nonstop.
The system doesn’t run just by putting suits on idiots and morons, and it’s even more difficult to make them understand human speech or thought processes.
“Look at me. I’m wearing a crappy coat and a utility belt in glorious Korea, where pickpockets and robbers are practically nonexistent. You could say it’s a symbol of intelligence.”
Instead of a stiff suit that hinders movement, I wear casual but practical clothes. And instead of carrying a duffel bag, I wear a thick utility belt.
Is this what they call the spirit of preparedness?
“So I’d appreciate it if you’d tell me. Just who the h*ll are you, diverting my heaven-bound clients to h*ll?”
“You are very…interesting. I thought you were going to talk about the same old-fashioned ‘G*d’s will’ or ‘duty’ like those guys, since you came here so confidently.”
“Every man carries a resignation letter and a Bible in his heart. Does this make me look a bit like those drifters?”
I’d already thrown away my resignation letter, so all I had left was the Bible to shake.
Then, the Bible in my hand opened on its own and the pages started flipping wildly with a rustling sound.
The Bible, possessed as if by a ghost, stopped at a certain page in the windless space.
“What they call the ‘Bible’ actually has missing pages that are not generally known, or rather, not publicly disclosed.”
━Revelation 1:1
As the Antichrist declared the coming of darkness, the primordial light faded.
“Isn’t it interesting? They always try to instill a sense of urgency about the future, saying that the final selection will take place on Judgment Day, separating the saved from the damned, but they turn a blind eye, deaf ear, and silent mouth to the greater truth. They don’t teach anyone about this.”
As I flipped through a few more pages, I found numerous unknown apocrypha that didn’t exist in a regular Bible.
It was full of blasphemous content that directly challenged the authority of the Lord Jesus, who promised to love and save all equally, saying that on the last day, the number of people who would be corrupted and punished would be overwhelmingly greater than those who would be saved.
“Humans are very susceptible to corruption. They have a strong desire to fulfill their instinctive needs, and although they possess intellect, they are easily swayed by impulses. If you just twist their existing way of thinking, morals, ethics, and sense of order, even a devout nun can fall into a lewd person no less than the W*ore of Babylon. Those who call themselves pastors in this world will go beyond committing sins to justify themselves if they can only touch money and a woman’s flesh. In other words, it’s not an exaggeration to say that all humans harbor a desire for the liberation of their repressed desires and a longing for an easy and comfortable life.”
“So you handpicked the most vulnerable members of society, like delicious side dishes, and corrupted them?”
I sort of understood the content of the book of Revelation, which said that the dead who crawled up from h*ll would curse the holy heavens and openly torture or blaspheme the children of G*d, humans.
But like I said, I don’t believe in fate.
If I say I’m going to send sinners to heaven, then I’m going to send them to heaven. Why so many words?
I closed the Bible once and opened it again, and it returned to its normal pages.
“The Ten Commandments play a very important role in the Bible. In fact, there’s a saying that if you just keep the Ten Commandments, you won’t lose half your life. But it’s true that the underprivileged are disadvantaged because of circumstances that make it impossible to keep the Ten Commandments. If you’re starving to death and there’s a delicious-looking ‘sin’ burger and faith grass in front of you, what would you choose? Nine times out of ten, it’s the burger.”
Unless you’re a crazy vegan.
“What I’m trying to say is, don’t act so smug when you’ve basically had sinners on a silver platter. Do you really think they willingly ate human flesh and took out the organs of corpses to build altars? Do you really think they’re corrupted because they’re dancing like crazy people, smearing human blood all over their bodies for your sake? No. Not at all.”
I opened one of the doors next to me and kicked the skull that rolled out with my foot.
“Who likes this outdated style? If you’re going to corrupt them, do it more convincingly, with a sense of trendiness. There are plenty of things that men and women love to death, right?”
SSS-class beauty! SSS-class monster c*ck!
“They all repented and prayed in front of me so quickly. Why do you think that was? Frankly, it’s because your methods were so pathetic. They followed you because you promised them something good, but then you made them kidnap people, cut open their stomachs, take out their organs, and the only food you gave them was human flesh. Of course they’d want to be corrupted again and go to heaven.”
“There are always those with weak faith.”
“You’re trying to corrupt humans and blaspheme against the almighty and great monotheistic G*d? Then you should have been more careful and strived for perfection. Don’t you think it’s too contradictory? Or are the people in your line of work just lacking in ‘professionalism’?”
I saw a crack in the man’s poker face, which he had been maintaining ever so slightly.
“Han Dae-ri, who gives no openings!”
I kicked the rolling skull with a kick honed from military soccer.
For a moment, the man seemed to sense my intentions and tried to block my way by flinging open all the doors in the narrow hallway. But it was meaningless against a man’s determination.
Crack! Bang! Crunch!
I ran with all my might, ripping the old doors off their hinges, and charged at the man who was frowning.
Less than 3 meters to go. Just a few more steps and I could punch that pretty-boy face with my knuckles. There was a time when I thought that.
“When it comes to ‘professionalism’, I have nothing to say. I actually have many more mouths to speak with, but this world is still full of those who lack faith. I’m working so hard to save them, but they don’t seem to appreciate it. It saddens me.”
“At least try proselytizing with drugs and s*x!”
“Oh my, that method is a relic of the past. You know how Sodom and Gomorrah were dealt with, don’t you?”
I was half-floating in the air, held by dozens, hundreds of hands that emerged from inside every door.
I was only a few steps away, but instead of moving forward, my body was slowly being pulled away.
“Before you introduce humans to the pleasures of corruption, the first thing you need to do is imprint. Just like the guy up there sprinkles a sliver of supernatural power in front of his followers as a miracle, it’s the first step they have to go through to have a righteous belief and strong faith.”
“So is drug and s*x proselytizing a real thing?!”
“Well, wouldn’t your cheap soul find out after it falls into h*ll?”
With that, the man turned away with a sneer.
At the same time, the force pulling my body from all directions intensified. At this rate, my flesh would soon be ripped apart, leaving me unrecognizable.
I already knew what the obvious outcome would be, so I knew the man had turned his back on me.
So I stuck out my tongue like a frog and bit down hard without a moment’s hesitation.
Crunch!
All the physical force holding my body and the unpleasant floating sensation disappeared.
I was just standing in the middle of the hallway, where there had never been any doors, strangling myself with my own hands.
By the time I had pried my tightly clenched hands off my neck and my vision, which had been blurring, had returned, I realized that no one had been here from the beginning.
It was all hallucinations, auditory hallucinations, and delusions caused by shortness of breath.
I guess I was possessed from the moment the skull rolled out.
I immediately figured out the man’s specialty.
“It wasn’t drug and s*x proselytizing, but hypnosis and s*x proselytizing.”
I secured my half-torn tongue and moved forward. I’m going to fight back with Bible and s*x proselytizing.
S*x.
