Ch 389: Waiting For The Third Fisherman

“Hey, hey, you all saw, I didn’t do anything; she threw herself at me.” To prove his innocence, Ye Xiao raised his hands high above his head, his panic seemingly tinged with enjoyment?

Cable wasn’t sure, but he knew his expression must have been helpless and speechless.

“Cable, I don’t mean to be your stepfather, of course, if you really want to experience some fatherly love, I can take a loss. You might not be able to call me that in front of so many people. So, privately you can secretly call me a couple of times to get used to it. When you’re used to it, calling me that in front of everyone won’t be a problem!”

When Professor X and Magneto arrived, the scene they saw nearly made their jaws drop.

Jean Grey’s personality and Dark Phoenix’s personality were complete opposites. The former was always cautious in everything she did, afraid of hurting others; the latter was always very high-profile, fearless, and didn’t care about anyone.

But neither would act like an unreasoning wild beast, tearing at food it couldn’t bite.

Jean Grey was lying behind Ye Xiao, enveloped in a Phoenix phantom. The Phoenix opened its large mouth, trying to swallow Ye Xiao whole.

Whether its mouth was too small or Ye Xiao’s head was too big, Ye Xiao’s head got stuck in the Phoenix phantom’s mouth, neither able to be swallowed nor spat out.

But the Phoenix phantom seemed to enjoy it, happily flapping its wings, its eyes narrowed, emitting a cat-like purr.

Jean Grey, enveloped by it, looked at a loss, her bewildered eyes clearly visible; obviously, she didn’t understand the situation either.

“Professor!”

“Jean, are… you alright?” Professor X, pushing his wheelchair, quickly slid down the steps.

Magneto waved his hand, and in an instant, the control of the nanobots along the way was in his hands.

“Hey, you old man, I was just about to show off my divine power!” Wade, who had been planning to use the performance to attract some attention, carried the broken thing on his shoulder and said unhappily, “Do you know how much your actions have affected me? My popularity is about to break… wait, let me count, tens, hundreds, thousands, ten thousands… anyway, there are several zeros at the end, you’re costing me money, you know! Pay up!”

Looking at the dirty hand offered to him, the foul odor at the tip of his nose clearly told him he hadn’t been wrong on the way; it was smelly, and the smell was emanating from this person in front of him.

That kind of stench, which seemed to overwhelm even the soul, made Magneto open his mouth.

“Ugh~”

“Hey, hey, hey, what do you mean? Are you trying to extort me?” Wade, imitating Ye Xiao, raised his hands high, unaware that his sweaty armpits were undoubtedly adding insult to injury for Magneto.

Magneto vomited even more violently.

“Everyone saw, I didn’t do anything, I didn’t even touch him. If anything happens to him, it’s not my fault!”

“Internet friends, quickly screenshot this, in case Wanda gives me trouble, so I have evidence to prove my innocence!”

“…”

“Oh? So that’s how it is, ha ha!”

Hearing from his internet friends that the Magneto before him wasn’t the one he knew, and that he didn’t have a daughter named Wanda, Wade was no longer afraid, hands on hips, like a woman who was right.

“Hey, old man, you want to extort me? You’re blind! Don’t you know who’s standing in front of you? Let me tell you, I am Deadpool, the man who frightens everyone and makes male ghosts tremble!”

“If you haven’t heard of my reputation, that’s fine; from today onwards, every day of your life will be lived in my shadow. Are you ready to face my revenge?”

“Behold my counterattack technique!”

With a thud, Wade fell to the ground, clutching his stomach, rolling and wailing.

“Ouch, ouch, it hurts!”

“Help! Everyone come and look! An eighty-year-old man, blind as a bat, ran into this handsome and invincible young man!”

“Old man, unless you give me a couple of hundred thousand, you won’t get rid of me!”

“Ouch, I feel like my bones are about to break, my liver, spleen, lungs, kidneys, everything hurts! You gave me appendicitis, duodenitis, keratitis, cervicitis, mastitis…”

After listing all the diseases he could think of, Wade groaned while hugging his stomach.

“Pain, it hurts so much, I’m about to die! Is there anyone kind enough to help me call an ambulance!”

“I heard ambulances in the USA are quite expensive, aren’t they?” Ye Xiao looked at Bullet, curiously asking, “And treatment isn’t cheap either, is it? Look at this old man, he’s already so old and still in a wheelchair; he must have missed the best time for treatment, which is why he’s disabled!”

“I heard rich people go to the hospital by helicopter; poor old man, he can’t even afford an ambulance!”

“What are you pretending for?” Bullet rolled her eyes, pulled Xuexu up, and looked at Professor X, respectfully calling, “Professor!”

“Who are you?” In his memory, Professor X didn’t remember having these two students in his school. Generally speaking, only his students would call him Professor.

Outsiders either called him Charles directly or his full title, Professor X.

Bullet, having removed her mask when she saw Professor X, pulled down her clothes, revealing her uniform, pointed at the logo, and said, “I’m a trainee X-Men, and so is Xuexu!”

Xuexu felt a little uneasy; she wasn’t yet an X-Men. Although she had the strength to become one, firstly, she had only been enrolled for a short time, and secondly, although she wanted to become an X-Men, the school was currently short-staffed, and the teachers were busy on missions, so no one had time to assess her.

Colossus, who was in charge of assessing Bullet, had also added her to the assessment list, waiting for Professor X and the others to return before submitting her name.

Xuexu didn’t know this, nor did she know that Colossus was going crazy. He woke up to find that two students were missing, and their bedrooms were in a mess, with clear signs of a fight.

If he hadn’t smelled the scent of Deadpool, he would have thought the two had been kidnapped.

“Oh!” Professor X’s eyes lit up, and he quickly sized them up, nodding in satisfaction. “It seems you’re doing well, that’s good, that’s good!”

He sighed. Since the Dark Phoenix ignited the mutant war, the school he founded had become very small, and there had been no new students for a long time.

The remaining mutants had completely hidden themselves; they didn’t trust anyone.

It was foreseeable that even if humans didn’t research food to suppress the X-gene, it would become even more difficult for mutants to live in human society.

“Whoosh whoosh!”

“Oh, my scalp, my ingrown toenail, my hair follicle nerve endings…”

Magneto, having vomited until he could vomit no more, wiped his mouth and looked at Professor X, who showed no abnormalities. Seeing the Professor’s hand holding the wheelchair was slightly pale, he knew the Professor was suppressing it with great difficulty.

‘You want to pretend nothing happened? Not so easy!’

In all his years, he had never suffered such a huge insult. The actual harm was minimal, but the humiliation was extreme. He was a man who cared about his reputation, and having vomited all over the place in front of so many people, Magneto felt embarrassed and wished he could find a crack in the earth to hide in.

With a flick of his finger, a nanobot with flapping wings, with the speed of lightning, flew directly into Professor X’s nose.

“Professor!” Jean Grey, seeing Magneto’s little action, couldn’t help but warn him, but it was too late.

Professor X’s face changed repeatedly. Unable to hold it in any longer, he sneezed, and the breath he had been holding was instantly released.

“Inhale! Ugh~”

Bullet and Xuexu closed their eyes, unable to bear to look, but driven by curiosity, they both opened a small slit, secretly watching their professor’s embarrassing scene.

Jean Grey twitched the corner of her mouth. Two old rascals, used to playing tricks on each other, couldn’t bear to see the other doing better than themselves.

Professor X vomited quickly and felt the feeling disappear just as fast. He used his powerful psychic power to forcibly control his urge to vomit, and as if he hadn’t seen the vomit on his legs, he said to his two students, “How did you two get here?”

Logically speaking, missions involving time travel were handled by official X-Men members; even if there were trainee members, there would always be senior members with them.

But looking around, the only one who fit the profile of a senior member seemed to be Cable, who was wearing a mask, silent, and wishing he could curl up into a ball?

If he hadn’t heard wrong just now, it was Cable, that’s right.

But, what did stepfather mean?

Cable curled up, his eyes fixed on the ground; he was looking for a crack in the ground, preferably a large one, so he could slip right in.

Even knowing that this Jean Grey wasn’t his mother, it was still better than not being his mother; at least he wouldn’t worry about his life being in danger.

Mothers from other worlds were unpredictable; without any nurturing grace, they wouldn’t hesitate to act.

“Ouch~” Wade was still wailing while hugging his stomach.

The more people ignored him, the more intensely he seemed to wail, as if only this way could awaken people’s sympathy.

“You ouch your butt; your problems are nothing compared to mine!” Ye Xiao pointed to his head, sneering, “Let me make it clear, I only have one chance to make a move. The Phoenix is currently absorbing my life force. When it drains all my life force, well, that guy upstairs who’s been peeping on us will make his move!”

Kang upstairs, who was about to make a move, sat back down after hearing this.

“Haha, suck, suck hard, suck him to death!”

Even if he was slow, he had already reacted. What mysterious enemy? It was right in front of him! Among several people, Ye Xiao was the most unusual.

He hardly ever made a move along the way, and the weapons he provided were as if specifically designed to restrain him. All the robots cut by the knife had lost their kinetic ability.

Moreover, he couldn’t find the models of these robots on the list, as if they had never been produced.

If he hadn’t seen it with his own eyes and had the production records in his mind, Kang wouldn’t believe such a bizarre thing.

“This should be some kind of conceptual ability!”

Kang frowned. In terms of technology, he wasn’t afraid of anyone, but when it came to these mysterious things, he wasn’t unfamiliar, just not proficient. He had corresponding preventive measures, provided he knew what ability Ye Xiao was using!

“Let the Phoenix test the waters first!”

If the Phoenix could directly drain Ye Xiao, naturally, he would have one less opponent. He hadn’t thought of a way to deal with Ye Xiao yet, but he had plenty of ways to deal with the Phoenix.

Whether it was offering the Phoenix irresistible conditions or eliminating it, he could do it.

Of course, if he encountered the complete Phoenix, he would stay as far away as possible. In the entire multiverse, few people could provoke the complete Phoenix.

“How much longer can you hold on?” Cable, burying his head between his legs, looked like a helpless little girl, but his voice was too rough. “If we can’t, let’s go back?”

“Do you think I’m here on vacation, coming and going as I please?” Ye Xiao took out a cigarette from his pocket in frustration, poked it at the top of his head, didn’t look to see where he poked the Phoenix phantom, felt like the cigarette should be lit, took it down, and put it in his mouth, “I’m here on a mission; I can’t leave until the mission is completed, huh?”

Tapping the Phoenix phantom above his head, Ye Xiao said in a negotiating tone, “How about a deal? Don’t suck anymore, and after I complete the mission, you can suck as long as you want. Otherwise, at this rate, we’ll be stuck here for hundreds of years!”

“What? Hundreds of years?” Wade screamed, jumping up from the ground, “No, I don’t agree!”

Hundreds of years without missions; how much money would he lose?

“Those two old men might not even survive until tomorrow! They don’t need hundreds of years; in a few decades, their bones will turn to dust!”

“Besides, if I don’t water the fields for hundreds of years, the pipes will age!”

Watching the surging water flow through the seedlings, nourishing the parched land, was one of his greatest hobbies.

What if he didn’t water the land and someone else occupied it?

‘Hundreds of years?’

Cable secretly groaned in his heart. Forget hundreds of years; he felt like he was living each second like a year. He always felt that the next second, Dark Phoenix would appear and swallow him whole.

“I’m sorry, I can’t control myself!” Jean Grey sighed in relief, then said in surprise, “You have the most vigorous life force I’ve ever seen!”

Let alone ordinary people, even those as strong as Professor X and others, if she wanted to, she could drain all their life force in less than a second.

But Ye Xiao in front of her didn’t seem human. She could feel Ye Xiao’s life force continuously flowing away, but it was like a drop of seawater in the ocean, so insignificant compared to the whole ocean.

For some reason, she felt that Ye Xiao was lying. At this rate, even thousands of years wouldn’t be enough for her to drain him completely.

Perhaps she wouldn’t even need to collect other Phoenix Force fragments; just by absorbing the life force in Ye Xiao’s body, it would be enough for her inner Phoenix Force to complete the Phoenix Nirvana.

“His life force is also plentiful!” Ye Xiao pointed to the silent Wade, giving the Phoenix phantom an idea, “Why don’t you suck his? He’d surely be happy to be sucked by you; he’s wanted to be Cable’s stepfather for a long time.”

As the saying goes, a quiet child is usually up to mischief.

The only things that could keep Wade quiet were money and when he was racking his brains for bad ideas.

And Wade’s bad ideas were definitely unacceptable to ordinary people, so Ye Xiao didn’t mind giving him something to do.

“How did you know?” Wade blurted out, without any embarrassment at being exposed, winked at Jean Grey through his mask, licked his lips, and said, “If you want, come on, suck as much as you like, but it’s better to suck a different head, that way, not only will you be comfortable, but I’ll be comfortable too~”

Cable threw a plasma grenade at Wade’s feet, electrocuting Wade so he couldn’t speak properly. Then, with a bang, Wade’s body was blown to pieces.

The foul-smelling blood splashed onto Professor X and Magneto, who were caught off guard.

Break, seeing the situation was not good, flew directly to Ye Xiao’s side and stabbed itself into the steps.

“You…”

“Don’t misunderstand, Professor,” seeing Professor X’s expression change, Bullet quickly explained, “That scumbag has immortality comparable to Logan’s; he can’t die!”

“Not only can’t he die, but when he dies, it’s like going home.” Ye Xiao complained.

Wade had successfully hooked up with death. Wade actually hoped he would die more often; each death was a physical and mental relaxation for him.

But this time seemed different.

“Huh?” The resurrected Wade scratched his head, accidentally peeling off a piece of rotten scalp, and nonchalantly rubbed it on his body. He propped his chin with one hand and started his rare brainstorm, “Where are my mansion and beautiful women? Could it be ‘Cable’ again?”

Because of Thanos’ curse, this time after death, Wade didn’t see the alluring figure soaking in the water; there was only brief darkness, but his consciousness was clear, so clear that he searched for a long time in the darkness, unable to find a place to relax, and feeling bored, he “swam” back.

“It must be him!” Slamming his palm, two ounces of flesh also vibrated. Wade cursed, his words unspeakable.

If Thanos had a genealogy, his ancestors would have suffered a lot with him.

Magneto, seeing Wade’s body for the first time, widened his eyes, his throat churning, as if he was about to vomit again.

“How can there be such a person?”

He considered himself knowledgeable, but he had never seen such a strange person as Wade.

His entire body was almost without a single intact piece of skin, as if he had been steamed at high temperatures. His skin was loose, as if it would fall off with a touch, and the “blisters” caused by burns were crystal clear, as if they would burst with a poke.

False! They’d burst even without poking!

Magneto watched as Wade’s pus-filled blisters burst, pus flowing out, adding another layer of wetness to Wade’s already sticky body.

Yellow, green, black; before this, Magneto had never imagined that a person’s body could be so colorful.

“Ugh~”

Acidic gastric juice rushed to the back of his throat. With his mouth open, Magneto vomited some sour-smelling gastric juice.

The gastric juice was slightly viscous, hanging from his mouth, dripping onto the ground.

At this moment, Magneto looked exactly like an idiot who couldn’t control his bowels and bladder and needed care.

“Don’t touch my wheelchair!” Professor X, who hadn’t dared to turn around, was terrified.

“Hehe!” Magneto showed a broken expression, manually turning Professor X’s wheelchair around. “Charles, open your eyes!”

“Ugh~” Professor X frantically shook his head. Forget opening his eyes; he didn’t even dare to open his mouth.

If the smell entered his mouth, it would be even more intense than being sucked into his nose.

“If you don’t open them, I’ll help you!” Magneto extended his evil hands, prying open Professor X’s eyelids, forcing him to open his eyes.

Professor X tried his best to roll his eyes upwards, but… he still saw it!

“Ugh~”

Magneto contentedly let go of his hand and waved at Wade as if swatting a fly.

Instantly, countless nanobots clung to Wade’s body, transforming into a red and black suit, exactly the same as Wade’s previous one.

“Wow!” Wade’s attention was immediately drawn to his new suit. He touched it up and down, marveling, “A mini-Peter nanobots suit! I knew I was the true Spider-Man. From now on, call me Deadpool-Spider!”

“Whoosh whoosh!”

“Still sucking, Big Sister? Why don’t you take a break and have a cigarette?”

Ye Xiao was helpless; he couldn’t deal with Kang while having a tail behind him, could he?

Huh? I have an idea!

His eyes turned, Ye Xiao pointed to the top of his head, “See? The one peeping on us upstairs, that’s my mission. So, how about this, you help me deal with him, and I’ll let you suck your fill!”

“If you agree, then release your mouth; if you don’t agree, I’ll have to use violence!”

“I agree!” Jean Grey said with some difficulty, “But I can’t control myself!”

It was a strange feeling, as if in a battle of psychic powers, she had lost to Dark Phoenix and was controlled by her, but at that time, her consciousness would mostly fall into a deep sleep, rarely waking up.

Generally speaking, only when Dark Phoenix was bored would she return control of her body.

Of course, she could also resist and interfere with Dark Phoenix’s actions, but it would mostly have little effect. Being able to prevent Dark Phoenix from fully utilizing her strength was already her limit.

This was the first time she had experienced this, being conscious and unable to control her body without Dark Phoenix appearing.

Not only her; Dark Phoenix, who had fallen asleep and was digesting after absorbing too much life force, was also stunned.

She was a dark personality fostered by the Phoenix Force. If the Phoenix had a need to eat, it would be done through her.

This was the first time she had encountered the Phoenix bypassing her to eat on its own.

“You can’t control yourself, but someone can! Come out, Dark Phoenix!” Ye Xiao shouted loudly.

“Caw caw——”

It seemed as if a crow flew over their heads, emitting a mocking sound.

Ye Xiao clenched his fists. Wade, imitating the crow’s cry, was like a duck with its throat pinched, unable to make a sound.

“I know you’re awake; if you don’t come out, don’t ever come out!” Ye Xiao didn’t give himself face, and he wasn’t going to give Dark Phoenix any face either.

Let alone just a Phoenix fragment; even a complete Phoenix was like a monkey in Buddha’s hand, no matter how it jumped around, it couldn’t escape Buddha’s Five Finger Mountain.

Dark Phoenix, intending to observe the situation before acting, inexplicably felt a chill down her spine, as if being targeted by something terrifying.

The next second, Jean Grey’s demeanor changed.

If Jean Grey had a gentle expression before, the current “Jean Grey” was a powerful Big Shot. Standing there, without doing anything, she was enough to bring endless pressure to people.

Feeling the change in Jean Grey’s demeanor, Cable buried his head even deeper.

‘Can’t see me, can’t see me, can’t see…’

For a moment, he really wanted to leave with Bullet and Xuexu. As for Wade, who came with them, a scumbag; let him die wherever he wants.

What about the altered future? Let it change as it pleases. He, a “nobody,” had already tried it. As for the rest… the sky falls and the tall ones will bear it; what’s the use of a small person worrying?

Those who can solve the problem aren’t in a hurry; he, who can’t solve the problem, is worried about this and that. It’s really unnecessary worry.

“I agree to your request, but I need to see the chips you can offer to get me to act!” The Phoenix phantom dissipated, and Dark Phoenix licked her lips, greedily taking a deep breath.

“Uh…”

Dark Phoenix’s face changed; something was wrong!

If before, when the Phoenix phantom was sucking, Ye Xiao’s life force was like sweet spring water, one sip was equivalent to the life force of an entire planet she sucked.

Now, it was like sewage from a ditch; it could be drunk and would quench thirst, but a little would cause diarrhea, and a lot would send one to the ICU!

“Then do you agree to my request?” Wade, who had somehow appeared beside Dark Phoenix, struck a muscular pose, seemingly showing off his male hormones, “My life force is also abundant!”

His implication caused Dark Phoenix to break down on the spot.

“Ugh~”